3 steps to create an identity shift and change your life forever.

It’s time to go inwards, not outwards.

Paco Chávez

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Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash

I used to be a heavy smoker, even though I was also an athlete. That’s because I identified as one. I justified the fact that I could run a complete marathon and still light a cigarette or even worst, spend a whole day puffing on those awful e-cigs. This is a very dangerous place to be in, because even though you can look good and perform good, you’re still creating a damage that will eventually bite you in the ass. And it did. I smoked daily for 6 years until I had a serious back injury with was caused by the combination of excessive heavy lifting and smoking. It wasn’t until I lost the ability to run and lift that it hit me really hard, I needed to change. From running 42 kilometers and feeling somewhat okay (42k is still a bitch), to running two kilometers and feeling like my back was going to break in two. It got even worse when I became a DJ. Every gig would leave me even worse since I couldn’t say no to smoking. When you’re the artist, everybody wants to be your “friend”. They crawl up to you like moths to a lamp, and since they’re fucked up, they think you want to be too. So they pass the joint, the offer to light your cigarette. Don’t have one? Have 3. Here’s a beer. Have a shot with me. Want some molly to lift you up? How about some PCP or cocaine? Let’s have a line of Ritalin! After one of the most fucked up nights of my life, I woke up with a sever panic attack, neck and back pain like I had never felt before, I literally thought I was paralyzed. I had nightmares and intrusive thoughts about killing myself. It’s been almost a year since that night and I thank God every day that he gave me the strength to build myself back up again. I went to a different type of rehab. I went inwards, on a spiritual recovery. Your problems are not fixed by simply going to an ayahuasca ceremony, it can even make your cravings to addiction even more powerful. You don’t heal by just sitting down and meditating while you repeat to yourself “I am love, I am abundance”. You actually have to feel pain. Pain you didn’t let yourself feel when you were a child. Our body carries physical inflammation from emotional experiences we had when we were younger, and you must be willing to forgive people who seemingly “hurt you” had they the intention of doing it or not. You…

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Paco Chávez

I write about mental health, exercise, nutrition and mindset for your daily life.