Why do bad things happen?

And why you feel like shit.

Photo by Bernard on Unsplash

“In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds meaning, such as the meaning of sacrifice”.

I’ve touched on this before but I really want to dive into this today. Because I really used to struggle with feeling like I got what I got because I’m a bad person. All the bad things and experiences I’ve had, I used to always believe that I deserved them. Bad grades in school, I got into many car crashes, I injured myself way too many times. I was treated badly in relationships, scolded by my parents. All because of who I was as a person, I believed I had done bad things in my past life and that I was know paying the price of my actions. Like any rebel child, I also stole, I destroyed, I disobeyed. While I grew up I also justified these bad things happening to me because of mistakes I made when I was younger, or this stuff wouldn’t havce happened to me. I realized that couldn’t be farther from the truth. See the thing is, bad things happen to good people. Bad things happen to great people. A lot of the worst things happen to the best people. Now I’m a firm believer, that not everything happens for a reason. I think some things do but not everything. The worst moment in your life, there may not be a reason behind it. It may just be something awful that’s happening to you, and I know it isn’t fair. Life’s not fair. It wasn’t fair that you had to go through that. It’s not fair that it might be something that hangs with you for the rest of your life. And just because this terrible thing is happening to you doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. I think that’s always where I got caught up. I believed I deserved everything that happened to me, and when you struggle with mental illness you really believe you deserve every single negative event that happens to you. We almost start to like the sensation of feeling sorry for ourselves, we start to inflict that type of pain unto us because at least we’ll feel something. Because we think we’re bad, we’ve been programmed into believing it is part of our identity, that we’re broken and will always be. “Bad things always happen to me”, even my friends used to re-affirm this to me. But we see it all the time, bad things are just a part of our world, it’s not personal. But the problem is, the difference between bad things and good things, is you have to work for good…